


I can't fight you anymore (it's you I'm fighting for)

by MYuzuki



Series: No matter what’s in front of me (I’ll keep fighting til I’ve won) [25]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Time Travel Fix-It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-16
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:28:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26496427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MYuzuki/pseuds/MYuzuki
Summary: In the end, they actually do end up writing a letter to Ardyn.Nyx isn't sure whether to laugh or scream, and settles for deploying himself to an active battlefield so he can stab things instead.
Relationships: Crowe Altius & Libertus Ostium & Nyx Ulric, Crowe Altius & Nyx Ulric, Libertus Ostium & Nyx Ulric
Series: No matter what’s in front of me (I’ll keep fighting til I’ve won) [25]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1897525
Comments: 10
Kudos: 124





	I can't fight you anymore (it's you I'm fighting for)

**I can't fight you anymore (it's you I'm fighting for)**

* * *

In the end, they actually do end up writing a letter to Ardyn.

Nyx isn't sure whether to laugh or scream, and settles for deploying himself to an active battlefield so he can stab things instead.

It's not that he disagrees with the fact that Ardyn needs to be contacted, because short of somehow kidnapping the man (if he could even still be considered a man, given the amount of Scourge coursing through his veins and the daemons tearing away at whatever's left of his soul) the only way they're going to get the _Imperial High Chancellor_ himself into the heart of the Lucian kingdom is if he agrees to it.

It's just that he doesn't _like_ it. Doesn't like the idea of letting an enemy, tragically betrayed by his brother two thousand years ago or not, being allowed to waltz right into Insomnia. Doesn't like it because he doesn't like Ardyn, remembers catching sight of him at the ceasefire gala in that other timeline, remembers the sly satisfaction in his smile and the way everything had gone to hell in a handbasket not long after that.

The situation is twice as frustrating, because it's his own plan that they're following through on and it's a _good_ plan. A better plan than the one it had replaced at least, the one that had involved asking Noctis to sacrifice his own life based on little more than the word of his ancestors that it would actually be worth it.

But even a good plan can have flaws, and the fact that they need to let Ardyn past their defenses when they've spent all this time keeping all scions of the Niflheim Empire _out_ …well, it's definitely a flaw. And it _rankles_ , more than a little, so Nyx heads out to vent some of his frustration through good old-fashioned violence against daemons and Magitek Troopers and leaves the matter of The Letter to Regis, Clarus, and Cor (and their team of diplomats and ambassadorial experts).

So he spends a week on the frontlines, tearing through enemy soldiers and providing support to the other Glaives in the area, and then returns to Insomnia considerably more exhausted but also correspondingly less likely to stab someone in the face.

The time away from the city has done him good mentally, too; as immersed as he's been in the constant push-pull of battle, he hasn't had time to stress out over the fact that apparently he's changing the fate of the world with his actions and on the whole he's a little more steady on his metaphorical feet than before.

At least, he's steady right up until he gets home to his apartment and finds Crowe and Libertus sitting in his living room eating all his food and drinking all his beer.

"What the hell are you two doing here?" he asks, torn between amusement and aggravation, all of it wrapped up in a warm sort of fondness. "Who's looking after things at headquarters?"

"Pelna," they reply in unison, and Nyx barely contains a snort of laughter.

"Poor Pelna," he says, shaking his head as amusement wins out over aggravation. "Saddling him with all the paperwork again, huh? Better watch out or he'll make you guys deal with the next batch of requisition forms."

Crowe rolls her eyes as Libertus scrunches up his face in an expression of supreme distaste, and Nyx laughs some more as he shucks out of his uniform jacket and detours to the bedroom to change into clothes that aren't charred from a week spent fighting in a war-zone. "Seriously, though," he says as he returns to the living room and swipes up one of the beers, "what are you you guys doing here?"

"Well, we heard from mission control that you'd be getting back either today or tomorrow," Libertus begins, flashing a grin that's almost as familiar to Nyx as his own, "and we didn't want to miss out on welcoming back Insomnia's favorite conquering hero!"

Nyx groans, sinking into the closest chair as he flips off his best friend with his free hand. "Man, don't start with that," he complains.

Libertus just chuckles at him, looking far too entertained for Nyx's peace of mind.

Crowe, meanwhile, is peering at him with an intensely thoughtful expression that immediately sets off alarm bells in his mind. "So," she says in a too-casual tone, "are you ever going to tell us?"

Nyx scowls at her. "Tell you what?" he asks, confused. "The meaning of life? As soon as I figure it out, Crowe, you'll be the first to hear about it, okay?"

She throws a wadded up napkin at his face. "Not that, jackass," she replies, exasperation laced with laughter in her tone.

"Well, what then?" he questions.

"I think you know what," she says, narrowing her eyes at him in what's _almost_ a glare but not quite.

"Not a mind-reader, Crowe," he retorts dryly, rolling his eyes. "I'm going to need a little more to go on than that. Try throwing in some nouns. Maybe some verbs and adjectives while you're at it."

" _Jackass_ ," she repeats, thumping one hand on the table in emphasis before subsiding. "I mean whatever was eating at you after all that bullshit with Drautos. Hell, _before_ the bullshit with Drautos. Whatever it was that was making you so twitchy all those weeks, looking around like you were seeing ghosts on every street-corner."

"I don't- That's-" He shakes his head, heart pounding as he struggles for words, because he'd thought he was out of the danger zone for this particular subject but apparently Cor is not the only observant friend he has. "What," he finally manages to croak out, feeling almost like he's been ambushed.

Libertus looks vaguely uncomfortable, scrubbing one hand through his hair in a gesture of nervousness. "We didn't want to push you about it," he says awkwardly, "because we figured if you wanted to talk to us about it, then you would."

"We thought you would _eventually_ , though," Crowe tacks on, chewing on her lower lip. "Because we always tell each other everything, right? So we waited for you to talk to us about whatever was bothering you. Except…except this time you never did. And it's been almost _three months_."

"Aw, shit," Nyx mumbles, rubbing the back of his neck tiredly. "Guys, it's nothing to worry about. Well, no, that's a lie, you would definitely worry if you knew but I already took care of-" He cuts himself off before he can say something incriminating. "Look, it's complicated, okay?"

"Who cares if it's complicated," Crowe retorts, crossing her arms and pinning him in That Look. "We're your friends, aren't we? We can handle complicated, as long as we know that _you're_ okay."

 _I'm not the one who got killed in a alternate timeline_ , he almost says, but doesn't, swallowing the words back down with another sip of beer. "I'm not drunk enough to have this conversation," he says instead, because he realizes that he actually does want to tell them, he _does_. But he doesn't think he can work up the nerve to do it, not with the way his mind is throwing up all the thoughts of what-if-they-think-you're-crazy.

Wordlessly, Libertus gets up from the table, ambles over to the fridge, fetches a fresh six-pack of beer, and them ambles right back over, plonking it down on the table. "Well, we have all night and I brought over enough beer to bring down an airship. So let's get started."

Nyx laughs so hard that he almost snorts beer up his nose. "Alright, alright," he says at last, relenting. "Fine. I'll tell you guys the whole fucking story, alright? But it's some crazy shit, so don't say I didn't warn you."

"We're Glaives, Nyx," Crowe says, rolling her eyes. "Crazy shit is our speciality."

Nyx gives a small grin, crooked and wry. "Yeah, but this is a real doozy, trust me." He takes a deep breath, trying to figure out where to begin. "Okay, well, believe it or not, it actually all started with you…"

So he lays it all out for them, starting with Crowe's ill-fated mission and ending with his own fate, drifting into ash and darkness in the light of a new dawn.

It's not like the time he'd explained it all to Cor, though, when Cor had let him talk and talk and talk and _talk_ , until he was hoarse from all the words and grief.

Instead, it's a far more interactive experience. His friends interject, asking for clarification about certain things ("My body was found _where_?!" "For fuck's sake, Crowe, don't make me tell it twice!") and offering up opinions about other things (such as Libertus's "Good to know that Lazarus is a dick in every universe" ). It's a more… _lively_ re-telling than he'd anticipated, but he's not exactly unhappy to be wrong about his assumptions for how this truth-telling bit would go down.

It makes him feel lighter, in a strange way, to be talking the whole thing through with his friends, almost as if the entire horrific tale is a particularly bizarre mission debriefing.

(Crowe and Libertus do end up punching him, one in each shoulder, and Nyx is honestly too relieved to mind the ache in his muscles from the strikes.

Because they're mad at him for being an idiot and not telling them sooner, for bottling up all his nightmares and worries instead of sharing them to ease the burden, but they _believe_ him, and that's worth as many punches as they feel like dealing out.

"Dumbass," Crowe says once all is said and done, voice rough with suppressed emotion as she yanks him into a fierce hug that almost suffocates him, even as Libertus circles them both with his arms, squishing all three of them together and not saying anything in a way that says _everything_.

Nyx loves his friends so much that it almost _hurts_ , and something in him that has been shaky and broken ever since he'd first seen Crowe's corpse in that other life and been forced to watch Libertus walk away from him, settles into place and heals as they stand their together in Nyx's apartment, huddled close in a tangle of limbs as a better future hovers on the horizon.)


End file.
